anything for a friend
by lannistersdebt
Summary: Remus can tell Lily is still in love with Severus, and that bugs him.


Growing up is hard, but growing up and moving on is harder. It's a lesson that Lily Evans has been in the process of learning for the past two years, and you've begun to wonder if she'll ever completely grasp it. Of the brightest witches or wizards you know, she's the one who has the most trouble with reality.

But you don't blame her.

Reality is rough and tough, and even in the muggle world it isn't easy. There are bills to pay no matter where you are, a job to obtain and to keep, friends to make and friends to let go of. In the case of the wizarding world right now, there's a war to prepare for and the world to protect.

You're scared of all that too, but you don't want to tell her that. You're Remus Lupin, and you've dealt with being a werewolf for the majority of your life. If you can deal with that, you're supposed to be able to handle anything that comes your way...right?

So instead, you just stay quiet. But it's rough whenever you can see the pain in her eyes every time she passes him in the corridors, or sees him sitting in the Great Hall when you enter for breakfast. You see the confusion on her face when she spies on him in the library, waiting to see if his group will join him but only ever seeing him work alone hour after hour. You feel her misery when she has something to share that, once upon a time, she would have taken to him. And in the silent moments when she thinks you aren't paying attention, you can hear the sorrow she's tried to bury since she lost her best friend and her first love.

Love's a funny thing, you've figured out. It comes and goes, and sometimes you get to keep it, but you're forced to let it go more often. You think that's the hardest part, and even though nobody ever asks you, you know that that's why you're always going to be careful with your heart. It's a fragile thing, and while love is beautiful, it is also cruel. You don't know that you could handle that.

"Remus, did you hear me?" Her voice, light on the afternoon air, cuts into your thoughts. Perfect timing, too.

"Sorry, I didn't. What was it you were saying?" You look at her, at the way the sun makes her hair burn like fire and at the way her eyes, green as emeralds, soften with her laughter. She's beautiful, and James is lucky. Maybe too lucky.

"I said that we should get back inside soon. I've got to get ready, and you mentioned earlier that you wanted to go to the library before everyone heads to the Great Hall." She stands and tugs on your arm, and you join her.

"Right, I did." Arm in arm you head to the castle.

It's a quick walk, and once inside, the two of you separate. Lily heads toward the common room and you hurry to the library. Madam Pomfrey dips her head to acknowledge you, and you give her a slight wave in return. The librarian has a soft spot for you, as many of the professors do. You're smart, you're quiet, and you're everyone's idea of the perfect Head Boy (although James actually has that spot). There isn't much reason for them _not _to like you.

You've spent so much time in here that you know exactly where to find Severus Snape, so it takes you almost no time at all to maneuver to the back corner of the library. It's his favorite spot to go because hardly anyone bothers him there; it isn't as though many of the Death Eaters in training are terribly interested in books and education. Nervous, suddenly, you slow as you approach his table.

"I've no interest in cursing you, Lupin." He looks up, and you're surprised to see he looks tired. Not angry, or hostile, or withdrawn. Just tired. "I presume you have a reason for coming over here?" He sounds tired too.

"I...yes." No snark, no hatred in his eyes. This is a different Snape than you're used to dealing with. Then again, he's never had as much of a problem with you as he has James or Sirius. "Why did you do it? Call Lily a…" You can't bring yourself to say it.

"I'm a Death Eater, if you haven't noticed, Lupin. It's what we do." He looks back down to his parchment, continuing to write, even as he speaks. "She didn't want my explanation, or my apology, anyway. What is it to you?"

"She misses you." The words come out faster than you wanted them to, and he looks up at you sharply.

"You're lying."

You shake your head. "She watches you when she can. Talks about the days before school, and from the first couple years here. I can see it, and feel it. She just won't admit it." He can tell you're just going to keep saying that, over and over, and he looks at you as though he's studying you. You tilt your head slightly. "Snape?"

He stands, and you're reminded for the first time in a while that he's taller than you. Slowly, he pulls back his left sleeve. Your jaw drops. There, on his forearm, is a skull with a snake protruding from it's mouth. "She's with James, Lupin. It's too late."

No response comes to you, and all you can do is nod and turn to leave him.

* * *

**A/N: **_This is for TheNextFolchart, for completing "The Book Thief Quote Challenge"_


End file.
